Children bring their mothers enormous pride and joy when they become engaged to be married. The planning for the mother of the bride and groom outfits begins once the rush of the amazing news subsides. Mother of the bride and groom outfits should be comfortable, well fitted and age appropriate, and can be matched to the color, theme and style of the wedding party. Mothers matching their suits has been a custom for several years. Attending other weddings, reading marriage magazines and visiting wedding attire shops can start the journey. Having a thought in mind as to style preference when starting the search may also be a good idea.

My son recently was asked to attend as best man in the wedding of one of his friends. The mother of the groom was disconcerted throughout most of the planning stages for the event because not all her ideas were put to use. The bride's mother tried to involve the groom's mother in the shopping process for their outfits, however the groom's mother had no interest.. The bride's mother selected her outfit choosing as her mother of the bride outfit an elegant, stylish and flattering gown. She looked beautiful and was a compliment to the entire wedding. The mother of the groom chose as her mother of the groom outfit the same dress style as the bridesmaids, but in a slightly different hue. Unfortunately, the outfit was not age appropriate or flattering to the groom's mother and she spent one of the most wonderful days she would ever have feeling sorry and absurd.

Several insights. When looking for a mother of the bride or groom dress, courteously ask the bride if she has any particular style in mind and if possible, take her along for fittings and to help select what she may want you to wear. The bride may have input if she and you want it, but do not hesitate to speak up if the gown she prefers is unflattering or cost is an issue.

Specialty dress shops have special mother of the bride and groom sections. Keep in mind you don't have to purchase your gown from a specialty dress shop. Department stores sell formal wear for specific times of the year and unique occasions. Guaranteed, those outfits will be lower priced than a gown in a specialty shop.

If, however, the bride has picked out something exclusive in a particular store, you may want to honor her wishes by accepting or at least considering her choice. If price is an issue, remind her that you are on a budget and look for something very close. If she still insists, then compromise becomes the solution. This is the bride and groom's special moment and it involves cooperation and support from the mother of the bride and groom. Once you experience the joy and laughter on this day, every hassle will be forgotten and you'll be the happiest mothers of the bride and groom ever.

The wedding my son was in made me recognize that the day belongs to the bride and groom, not me. I will aid them. I will offer suggestions if it's requested, hold my tongue if it's not. I will even allow them input on the mother of the bride and groom outfits so as to not worry them as their friend was embarrassed. Remembering that this is the bride and groom's day and not anyone elses may be the most significant lesson to come out of my children wedding day.

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